Day 137
Second day of our weekend away. Yesterday it was clear that my quest to be kind was irritating at least member of my family, so I today I tried to keep my kindness quest on the down low. Theme for the day, be kind to the environment. We did some hiking in the morning, and I picked up bits of trash along the way. Afternoon hike, same routine. I did have my limits however, nothing wet or gooey or otherwise disgusting, and whatever I picked up needed to fit in my pockets because I didn't think to bring along a bag. And to top off my garbage picking day, I fished four recyclable items out of the trash bin (they were very near the top, so no need to picture me with my arm plunged shoulder high in the trash can) and transferred them to the recycle bin that was right next to it.
Yesterday my son was trash talking my attempts at kindness. Today I'm talking trash too.
Saturday, August 14, 2010
Friday, August 13, 2010
The Family That Blogs Together... Part 2
Day 136
We are off for a weekend up north to do some hiking. After spending the morning packing and being in the car for 3 hours, it was almost 4 o'clock before I knew it. I started actively looking for an opportunity to perform a kind act since I have this self-imposed deadline and all. Apparently I was looking a little too actively. My younger son, more impacted by my new found committement to kindness than I realized, offered to write today's blog entry. You can only imagine my joy. After taking him up on his offer however, I realized the impact was a little different than I initally thought.
Here is my kind act for the day, from my son's perspective:
My mom was desperate to do a kind deed. She went on and on and on about what she should do. We went to get ice cream and when we got there, she said “Guys, I think we should get a gift cetificate for a cone to give to someone.” And I thought to myself “Can't we just get ice cream?” It feels a little weird doing kind things all the time.
Kindness. It's a work in progress.
We are off for a weekend up north to do some hiking. After spending the morning packing and being in the car for 3 hours, it was almost 4 o'clock before I knew it. I started actively looking for an opportunity to perform a kind act since I have this self-imposed deadline and all. Apparently I was looking a little too actively. My younger son, more impacted by my new found committement to kindness than I realized, offered to write today's blog entry. You can only imagine my joy. After taking him up on his offer however, I realized the impact was a little different than I initally thought.
Here is my kind act for the day, from my son's perspective:
My mom was desperate to do a kind deed. She went on and on and on about what she should do. We went to get ice cream and when we got there, she said “Guys, I think we should get a gift cetificate for a cone to give to someone.” And I thought to myself “Can't we just get ice cream?” It feels a little weird doing kind things all the time.
Kindness. It's a work in progress.
Thursday, August 12, 2010
Smile, Wave, Avert Your Eyes
Day 135
I was feeling a bit grumpy when I left work today, so I had to remind myself to be a considerate driver on the commute home. In general, since starting this project I think I am much kinder on the road (Wave of Kindness, April 15). But often, when I let cars in ahead of me, I feel annoyed if the driver doesn't wave thank you. My kind action is then followed by an unkind thought, sometimes some very colorful unkind thoughts. I know that if I were as nice as I want to be, I wouldn't care if someone acknowledged me. I would feel satisfied with my own actions. But between now and the next 99 years when I actually achieve that level of kindness, I need a coping mechanism.
So today, knowing I was not in the mood NOT to be acknowledged, I incorporated the wave, smile, don't look strategy. I made sure to let in ahead of me every car that I noticed waiting to enter traffic. I smiled and waved them in, but did not look at the driver. That way I did not actually know if they gave me the thank you wave.
I arrived home less grumpy, more relaxed, and free of unkind thoughts. I suppose it is true that ignorance is bliss.
I was feeling a bit grumpy when I left work today, so I had to remind myself to be a considerate driver on the commute home. In general, since starting this project I think I am much kinder on the road (Wave of Kindness, April 15). But often, when I let cars in ahead of me, I feel annoyed if the driver doesn't wave thank you. My kind action is then followed by an unkind thought, sometimes some very colorful unkind thoughts. I know that if I were as nice as I want to be, I wouldn't care if someone acknowledged me. I would feel satisfied with my own actions. But between now and the next 99 years when I actually achieve that level of kindness, I need a coping mechanism.
So today, knowing I was not in the mood NOT to be acknowledged, I incorporated the wave, smile, don't look strategy. I made sure to let in ahead of me every car that I noticed waiting to enter traffic. I smiled and waved them in, but did not look at the driver. That way I did not actually know if they gave me the thank you wave.
I arrived home less grumpy, more relaxed, and free of unkind thoughts. I suppose it is true that ignorance is bliss.
Wednesday, August 11, 2010
The Benefits of Procrastination
Day 134
Last week we received a call from Big Sisters, a non-profit in our area, asking us to donate clothes and household items we no longer use They distribute them to families in need and sell them to thrift stores, one of those being among my favorite shopping places. They said they would be doing a pick up in our area in a week. Tomorrow.
This is exactly what I needed. A deadline to clean out the closets and cupboards. Years worth of accumulation. Clothes that no longer fit, and hope has been abandoned that they ever will. Vases we will never use. Sheets that don't match any beds in the house. It was a week of mad sorting, washing and folding for the whole family. Tonight I looked at the pile of trash bags full, ready to be placed out in the morning and didn't see a kind act. I saw a mountain of procrastination, masquerading as kindness.
However, were it not for a worthy cause, I most likely would not have gotten it done. Yes, we benefit from the decrease in clutter, but our loss is the Big Sisters gain---One more for the kindness column.
Last week we received a call from Big Sisters, a non-profit in our area, asking us to donate clothes and household items we no longer use They distribute them to families in need and sell them to thrift stores, one of those being among my favorite shopping places. They said they would be doing a pick up in our area in a week. Tomorrow.
This is exactly what I needed. A deadline to clean out the closets and cupboards. Years worth of accumulation. Clothes that no longer fit, and hope has been abandoned that they ever will. Vases we will never use. Sheets that don't match any beds in the house. It was a week of mad sorting, washing and folding for the whole family. Tonight I looked at the pile of trash bags full, ready to be placed out in the morning and didn't see a kind act. I saw a mountain of procrastination, masquerading as kindness.
However, were it not for a worthy cause, I most likely would not have gotten it done. Yes, we benefit from the decrease in clutter, but our loss is the Big Sisters gain---One more for the kindness column.
Tuesday, August 10, 2010
Kind of Cranky
Day 133
I didn't make it a whole week with out spending any money on kindness. Today I'm out 50 cents. But it feels like less because I spent it in dimes.
At the lake near our house there is a great little arcade. Besides the usual games, there are also old fashioned penny, nickel and dime machines. There is one in particular where you put a dime in and the crane grabs some candy and drops it in the drawer. This has always been a favorite of my kids. When they were younger they named it Cranky after the crane on Thomas the Train. You are almost always guaranteed some candy for a dime. And if the machine is being particularly stingy, John, the man who runs the arcade, will fluff it up to increase the chances of making a good grab. My kids know that when we say “no more money for the arcade” that if they say “how about some dimes for Cranky?” we will usually acquiesce.
Today I left five dimes right by Cranky. I have to admit, I really wanted to see someone find them and get some claws full of candy. I know I am suppose to be satisfied by just knowing that a random act of kindness may bring joy, but sometimes, I'm just not that big of a person.
I hung around the arcade a bit, and walked by the machine several times. The stack of dimes was still there. Realizing that there is fine line between being creepy and being kind, and that an adult hanging around a candy machine waiting for children just might cross that line, I went and took a swim. When I returned, the dimes were gone.
Here's hoping that Cranky was kind.
I didn't make it a whole week with out spending any money on kindness. Today I'm out 50 cents. But it feels like less because I spent it in dimes.
At the lake near our house there is a great little arcade. Besides the usual games, there are also old fashioned penny, nickel and dime machines. There is one in particular where you put a dime in and the crane grabs some candy and drops it in the drawer. This has always been a favorite of my kids. When they were younger they named it Cranky after the crane on Thomas the Train. You are almost always guaranteed some candy for a dime. And if the machine is being particularly stingy, John, the man who runs the arcade, will fluff it up to increase the chances of making a good grab. My kids know that when we say “no more money for the arcade” that if they say “how about some dimes for Cranky?” we will usually acquiesce.
Today I left five dimes right by Cranky. I have to admit, I really wanted to see someone find them and get some claws full of candy. I know I am suppose to be satisfied by just knowing that a random act of kindness may bring joy, but sometimes, I'm just not that big of a person.
I hung around the arcade a bit, and walked by the machine several times. The stack of dimes was still there. Realizing that there is fine line between being creepy and being kind, and that an adult hanging around a candy machine waiting for children just might cross that line, I went and took a swim. When I returned, the dimes were gone.
Here's hoping that Cranky was kind.
Monday, August 9, 2010
Kindness Assist
Day 132
I've learned a thing or two about kindness these past few months, so when my husband asked for help with something having to do with being kind, I practically hurt myself jumping up to offer my assistance. Finally, my chance to shine.
He is an eighth teacher and will be going back to school soon. This week he received the list of all his students, along with their information, which included their birth dates. He said that, in the past, he has tried to send birthday cards throughout the year to all his homeroom students. But inevitably, he would forget someone, or towards the end of the year, stop doing it altogether.
Kindness queen to the rescue! This is what you need to do, I said. (And he just loves when I tell him what to do. Lives for it really.) Get the cards today, write them out, address the envelopes, put stamps on and have them all set to go. And he did.
This is one of the most important lessons I have figured out doing this project. When one has a thought about doing something kind, like send a card, or give a compliment, or drop off that bag of clothes for a charity, if it doesn't get done within 24 hours of the thought, chances decrease greatly that it ever will.
I absolutely believe that most people are kind and well intended, and I am certainly no kinder than the next person. But so often we think we are too busy, or we are procrastinators by nature. Our thoughts don't get translated into actions. The 24 hour rule of kindness has gotten me better than a third of the way to my goal. Hopefully, it will carry me the rest of the year.
I've learned a thing or two about kindness these past few months, so when my husband asked for help with something having to do with being kind, I practically hurt myself jumping up to offer my assistance. Finally, my chance to shine.
He is an eighth teacher and will be going back to school soon. This week he received the list of all his students, along with their information, which included their birth dates. He said that, in the past, he has tried to send birthday cards throughout the year to all his homeroom students. But inevitably, he would forget someone, or towards the end of the year, stop doing it altogether.
Kindness queen to the rescue! This is what you need to do, I said. (And he just loves when I tell him what to do. Lives for it really.) Get the cards today, write them out, address the envelopes, put stamps on and have them all set to go. And he did.
This is one of the most important lessons I have figured out doing this project. When one has a thought about doing something kind, like send a card, or give a compliment, or drop off that bag of clothes for a charity, if it doesn't get done within 24 hours of the thought, chances decrease greatly that it ever will.
I absolutely believe that most people are kind and well intended, and I am certainly no kinder than the next person. But so often we think we are too busy, or we are procrastinators by nature. Our thoughts don't get translated into actions. The 24 hour rule of kindness has gotten me better than a third of the way to my goal. Hopefully, it will carry me the rest of the year.
Sunday, August 8, 2010
My, What Lovely Flowers You Have
Day 131
I wrote a note today to the owner of the flower garden that I pass sometimes when I walk during my lunch time at work. I always love when someone compliments my gardens, so I hope that the keeper of this garden feels the same. I wrote how much I enjoy seeing what's blooming during the different times of the season, and that it is something I look forward to. I left it on the step by the front door.
I have been challenged by a follower of this project to go a whole week without spending any money on my acts of kindness. This is day three. It would be day five if I didn't count the lollipops I bought (Kindness at the Ready, August 5th), but I'm going to go for zero spending.
Ideas are always welcome...
I wrote a note today to the owner of the flower garden that I pass sometimes when I walk during my lunch time at work. I always love when someone compliments my gardens, so I hope that the keeper of this garden feels the same. I wrote how much I enjoy seeing what's blooming during the different times of the season, and that it is something I look forward to. I left it on the step by the front door.
I have been challenged by a follower of this project to go a whole week without spending any money on my acts of kindness. This is day three. It would be day five if I didn't count the lollipops I bought (Kindness at the Ready, August 5th), but I'm going to go for zero spending.
Ideas are always welcome...
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