Very Special Delivery

Day 362

I got an email yesterday from my niece  K with a kindness request.  She has a friend from Japan whom she shared an apartment with at college for a year several years ago.  They were in contact this week and K received the good news that her friend and her family are safe and well.  The friend mentioned in her email that one thing she really misses about being in this country is my chocolate chip cookies.  I used to send them fairly regularly as part of college care packages.

Well first of all, anyone who holds my cookies in such high regard immediately owns a special place in my heart.  International cookie acclaim  is even better.  And much more importantly, I feel grateful  for the opportunity to do SOMETHING for someone in Japan.  There is such a  pervasive feeling of helplessness reading the news about the crisis day after day and not being able to offer any assistance other than money.

Today I stopped by the post office to begin the investigative work regarding what is involved in sending cookies to Japan.  I learned that it is OK to send food through the mail and that regular post it will take 7 to 10 days to arrive.  Priority delivery is faster but prohibitively expensive.  The conclusion after a discussion during dinner tonight with three of my biggest cookie fans was that, after ten days in the mail they might not be as good as they were remembered, but the cookies would be greatly appreciated none the less.  Next week they will be on their way.

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Continuing with the top 10 reasons I am glad I did this blog, in no particular order, Number 3: 

It was fun to feel like I had a secret identity.

Kind of Cool or Kind of Creepy

Day 361

There is a house about a mile from me that always puts up interesting decorations for most holidays.  Currently there is a mannequin dressed green in honor I think, of St. Patrick's Day.  They are off beat type of things, not your average everyday holiday decor.  The truth is that my kids find most of them a bit creepy.  I however, love them.  Every time I pass the house I smile, even when they are in between displays. Today I put a note in the mailbox to tell the owners of the house how much I enjoy driving by their house and thanking them for that bit of joy.

Continuing with the top 10 reasons I am glad I did this blog, in no particular order, Number 4 (If anyone noticed yesterday was number 6 and this should be number 4, I had two number 8s.  I may be kind but apparently I can't count):

I have remembered that way back when, I used to like to write.

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I have been asked frequently if I am going to keep up with this blog after the year is over, which is four days for those of you not paying a lick of attention to my count down.   The answer to that question  is a resounding NO. I've enjoyed being kind and will try to continue daily acts, but the commitment to write every day is only good for a year.   HOWEVER, I am planing a new, slightly less labor intensive kindness project with my friend Kim starting on April 5th.

Coming soon!  The ABC's of Kindness.

Kindness For Me Too

Day 360

I dropped off a bag of clothes in the collection bin near our house today.  It feels a bit like cheating by counting this as an act of kindness since every bag of stuff I get out of the house is always an act of kindness for ME. 

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Continuing with the top 10 reasons I am glad I did this blog, in no particular order, Number 6:

I'm not 100 percent sure on this one, but I think my kids were impressed and I suspect it will make them at least a little kinder in life.

The Receiving End of Kindness

Day 359

All day I hoped for an opportunity to commit a kind act that didn't involve money and that would be absolutely fascinating to write about.  By mid afternoon I was on my way to pick up my kids and I decided it was more important to do SOMETHING than wait, just in case something never happened.  I  stopped to get some seeds for our bird feeder and briefly considered whether that could be my kind act, feeding the birds, but decided against it. Kind of a cop out, really. Instead I bought a five dollar gift card from the store and asked the cashier to give it to another customer.  I've done this before so it neither original nor fascinating.  But I have to say, it sure was fun!

And shortly after I got home with the boys something even more fun happened. A woman arrived at the house to deliver flowers for me.  They were from my niece and her husband and the note read "It's give flowers day to you!  We are inspired by your kindness."

Being kind all year has had it's rewards, but I have to admit, being on the receiving end just melted my heart.

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Continuing with the top 10 reasons I am glad I did this blog, in no particular order, Number 7:

People from all over this country and over a dozen other countries have read the blog, helping to remind me that the world is smaller than it seems and we are all connected.

The March Madness of Giving Flowers to a Stranger

I started my day knowing exactly how I was going to celebrate Give Flowers to a Stranger Day. We were planning to go out to breakfast after my boys' soccer game, which was at 7 AM. How unkind is THAT to have a game scheduled at that time on a Sunday morning? The plan was to leave the flowers, pink Gerber Daisies, somewhere in the restaurant.

The boys' team won the first game which meant they had another game at 8:00 AM, as today was the playoffs. If they won that game, then they had another one at 9:30. Now this could have meant a couple of things. I wouldn't have breakfast until closer to lunch time. Or we would give up the going out to breakfast idea altogether and just go home, forcing me to come up with a plan B for GFTSD. So I did something unkind; I hoped they would lose. Unfortunately for the team my hopes came true but at least I was kind enough to ACT disappointed.

By 9 AM the breakfast place was busy and I had to be super sneaky to get the flowers somewhere without being seen.  I put them on a table near us as a family was leaving, but before the staff swooped in to clean. The bus boy, a totally adorable a teenager, found them and showed them to the waitress along with the note I had written telling the finder to enjoy the flowers and consider it a random act of kindness. She looked around shocked, not in good way, and said rather loudly “Who gave permission to do this?” Not quite the response I was hoping for, and I got very busy looking at the menu so I wouldn't be accused of committing such an offense. She walked away and left the boy to clean the table. Apparently undeterred by his co-worker's outrage, the young man quickly took the flowers and with a smile, carefully placed them for someone else to find behind the counter near where the waitresses picked up the orders.

We didn't get to see who discovered them but it was just as much fun to see the bus boy enjoy taking part in what I can only assume was his first GFTSD.

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Continuing with the top 10 reasons I am glad I did this blog, in no particular order, Number 8

The birth of Give Flowers to a Stranger Day. Not only is it fun to celebrate every month, I am incredibly grateful for those who have participated. Giving flowers to a stranger is rewarding but actually can be more difficult than it seems; it's just not something one does in the course of their daily routine. Despite this, many people celebrated along with me. Friends, family and readers all over the country all helped make this a genuine holiday for kindness.

And I've had so much fun with it that it will continue in my friend Kim's and my new blog adventure The ABC's of Kindness.

Kindly Take These Doughnuts

Day 357


Friday I donated blood and for my trouble I received a coupon for a dozen free doughnuts. I immediately knew that they would be use for some type of kind act.

First I thought could bring them to work. However, I am aware that this might not be viewed as kind by my co-workers who were trying to eat healthy and or lose weight. Then I thought I would take them  to a police station as a thank you for the service of the officers. But then I considered that perhaps that would be seen as some type joke, poking fun at the stereotype of police officers always hanging around doughnut shops. And that wouldn't be kind at all.

This afternoon I was at the grocery store getting flowers (because tomorrow is the 27th, Give Flowers to a Stranger Day) and I decided to take a shortcut by just giving someone the coupon. The young man who was the cashier looked like a good choice. He was pleasant and friendly, young and thin. The second part was important because he seemed of the age and build that he wouldn't spend too much time perseverating about calories, carbs, or fat content. “This may seem like an odd question, but do you like doughnuts?” I asked. “Sure” he replied, with just enough enthusiasm that I believed he was telling the truth and not simply being polite. “Then this is for you” I said handing over the coupon. His surprise and appreciation appeared genuine, making it an all around fun activity for me.

Continuing with the top 10 count down of reasons I am glad that I did this blog, in no particular order, number 8:

It feels like a great accomplishment to commit to doing something every day for a year and then actually do it And I'm aware that I'm not done yet, but the chances of me quitting in the next week are pretty slim, so I think it's safe to put this out there.

Walk for Kindness and the Cure

Day 356

An easy call today for an act of kindness for a stranger.   My niece, who is a fourth grade teacher,  posted on her facebook page that she is walking and collecting donations for the Juvenile Diabetes Research Foundation Walk for a Cure, in support of one of her students who has diabetes.  This is something that is near and dear to me in a couple of ways.  One, I love my niece, so supporting her is important.  And two, I love my husband, who happens to have type 1 diabetes. This made it quite clear what today's kind action should be.

Continuing with the top 10 count down of reasons I am glad that I did this blog, in no particular order, number 9:

It has been an avenue to be in touch with some old friends from my past which has been fun and helped me appreciate the importance of such connections in my life.

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I am frequently asked if I am going to keep up with this blog after the year is over, the answer is a resounding NO.  While I plan on kindness being part of my daily routine, writing about it every night will not be.  And there is the added pressure that I may be disowned by my family if I even attempt to consider it.  BUT, writing about it every couple of days, in collaboration with a friend?  That might be a fun idea....A new blog will be born soon and you can find it here: The ABCs of Kindness.

Counting Down

Day 355

Ten days to go.  While there are some times I am asking myself, when is this project going to be over, for the most part, it has been a challenge I feel great that I took on. Especially since the end is in sight.  In recognition of this benchmark I will begin the count down of the top 10 reasons I am glad that I did this blog, in no particular order.


Number 10. Because I  talked to many folks this year whom I may never have even noticed, let alone spoken to.

So what did I do today?  I gave blood, which is a true act of kindness to a stranger I might add, not like some of them that I may have tried to sneak through under this heading over the course of this year.

And for all the people who have asked if I am going to keep up with this blog after the year is over, the answer is a resounding NO.  While I plan on kindness being part of my daily routine, writing about it every night will not be.  And there is the added pressure that I may be disowned by my family if I even attempt to consider it.  BUT, writing about it every couple of days, in collaboration with a friend?  That might be a fun idea....

Coming soon!  The ABCs of Kindness.

The Seeds of Kindness

Day 354

One of the goals of this blog project was to provide the motivation for my family to become more involved in volunteer work.  Last spring we started helping out at a local community garden. While my boys weren't as enthusiastic about it as I hoped they would be, they did it with minimal complaint which I considered a success. We've decided to volunteer (actually my husband and I decided, our sons didn't get a vote) again this year and started today by planting seeds which will, with a little luck, turn into plants to donate.

The boys still aren't so eager that they are counting down the days until we report to the community garden for opening day (April 16th) but they sure are looking forward to those seeds popping up. One small step for community service, one giant leap for soon-to-be sprouting vegetable plants.

Chasing Those Blogable Moments

Day 353

I chased down a family in the parking lot after soccer practice tonight to give them the sweatshirt the boy had dropped on the way to the car.  They were grateful and I felt fortunate for the blogable moment. 

The Write Sort of Kindness

Day 352

One of my colleagues P. has been coveting the pen I use at work as of late. It was one of those freebies that companies give away;. I'm not sure why it is such a special pen, but it is my favorite. Just the right weight, grip and ink flow. Apparently she thinks so too, because this very pen has disappeared from my desk a few times only to reappear on hers. Each time I retrieve it, P. smiles mischievously and says she has no idea how it ended up with her.


With my year of living kindly winding down (at least the blogging about it part) I'm starting to have to dig deep and look inside myself in thinking about what are true acts of kindness. And what says kindness more than the gift of a pen?

When P. arrives at work tomorrow, she will find on her desk what was only hers by thieving is now hers to keep. I wonder if she will use it to write me a thank you note.

Be Kind To The Environment In March, And Hopefully August Too

Day 351

I started seeds for my vegetable garden today.  It was a combination of spring fever and a commitment that I'm trying to make to purchase less produce that is not locally grown.  So what better way to eat local than to grow it myself.  We usually have a garden every year, so this isn't a totally new concept for my family.  But it is usually a haphazard one, overrun by weeds before the season  is half over.  And this is the first year we are starting the seeds ahead of time.  The hope is that this will extend our growing season and enable us to have some extra veggies for the freezer.  We started lots of broccoli plants as that is family favorite (everyone except me, but who am I not to encourage my kids to eat broccoli).  The plan is to try to stretch that crop so we are still eating it in the fall.

But alas I do realize  the plan for a garden when there is still a trace of snow on the ground and the thought of weeding in the hot sun is actually appealing might not play out as romantically in reality in August as it does in my head in March.  But for now I can aspire to be kind to the environment and say loud and proud, eat local!

Feeling Kind of Helpless

Day 350

I saw a collection jar for the recovery effort in Japan at Starbucks today.  I was surprised to see it there because it was clearly put on the counter by the staff and did not appear to be a corporation sanctioned  collection receptacle.  I asked the person at the register about it and she said yes, they just put it there without asking permission from the powers that be because it just seemed so important to do something.  Yet it felt like there was little that could be done from half a world away.

There was a temptation to completely empty out my wallet to donate because she was so accurate that the feeling of wanting to help was so compelling.  But I put in just a few dollars, knowing that it was as much to get rid of this feeling of helplessness in me and the coffee shop employees, as it it was to help the people of Japan.

Spy Work Disguised as Kindness

Day 349

I think volunteer work is a great act of kindness so today I helped out at my son's school.  I chaperoned the 6th grade dance.

Oh who am I trying to fool?  I did it so I could spy on my son.  I asked him if it was OK with him and he said sure of course it was, why wouldn't it be.  He's 12, and apparently doesn't realize that in a year or so, my mere presence will be a huge embarrassment to him.  But for a little while longer at least, I can use my cloak of kindness to monitor the sixth grade social life.

Pennies for Kindness

Day 348

It recently came to my attention that my kid's school is having a penny drive for charity.  I found out about it from the "virtual backpack," the  place on the school website for family notices. What? I've been doing this kindness blog for almost a year now and NEITHER of my sons asked me for some pennies to donate? I had to hear about on the internet?

I'm not sure where I went wrong, but you can be sure that tonight each of them have a few pounds of pennies in their backpacks to take to school tomorrow.

Kind of Fun

Day 347

I stopped for a coffee this afternoon and while I was waiting, I was looking at the items in the pastry case.  There was something called a "cake pop," a bite sized piece of cake, covered in a chocolate coating on a stick, like a Tootsie pop.  I'm not sure why but it made me smile, The man behind the counter noticed and commented that he was glad to see someone admiring the pastries.  I thought that if it made me smile, perhaps it would do the same for someone else. I bought one and asked him to give it to another customer after I left. 

He was genuinely excited to comply and said that he really hoped another customer came in soon because his shift was over in five minutes.   While I aspire to be kind without resorting to spending money,  it is always fun to see the kick that folks get when they are enlisted in my kindness plot.

Kind Of Meant To Be?

Day 346

My boys and I put a couple cans of soup in the collection bin at karate tonight. It was for another students community service project, so  we considered it a kind act times two.

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Here's an update on an act from last week, when I asked the woman behind the counter at the pharmacy to help me out by giving someone a gift card  I had purchased (Partners in Kindness, March 9th ). Today I went into the same store and the woman who helped me called me over to the counter.  She wanted to tell me what happened when she gave away the card. I had instructed her to pick anyone she wanted to give it to. She chose a “young girl” (and when I asked how young she said “in her 20's which  made me feel a tad old)  and presented it to her before she checked out. And then it just so happened the the “girl” was short a couple of dollars and used the gift card to pay for her purchase.

I'm tend not to be “it was meant to be” kind of gal, but this did give a bit of pause to the cynic in me.

Spring Magic

Day 345

Nothing says spring like daffodils, at least around this part of the country. And nothing says spring is never going to get here like raw temperatures and snow flurries in the middle of March. Guess what it was doing today? My attempt to move things along was to buy a bunch of daffodils and leave them for someone to find. It may be magical thinking, but it was definitely worth a shot.

I placed them on the sidewalk with a note outside the karate studio while my sons were in class. The note said “Happy Spring! It may be cold outside but spring is on the way. If you find these, then they are for YOU. Enjoy!” As it turned out a woman in their class found them as she was leaving and she was beyond excited. She went back into the building to show the teacher and the note was passed around. As this was unfolding I whispered to my boys that I was the one who left them. We ended up walking out  at the same time as the finder, and we overheard her saying to her friend, still smiling, “These will look perfect in my room.”

It was tremendous fun for me to be with my boys when this happened and for them to see how happy the woman was. My younger son commented “It was like she won a huge prize.” And I think that for maybe the first time in the year of this project we shared a moment of wonder and joy that kindness can bring.
 I may not have moved spring along any faster, but it was still a little magical.

Birthdays The Way They Were

Day 344

I sent a birthday card to one of my best friends from high school today. We used to exchange cards every year but we've lost touch in the recent few years. This project has helped remind me that I really would like to stay connected with her.

 I, along with most other people, have come to rely more on email and ,yes I'm embarrassed to admit, Facebook, to communicate with people.  But this particular friend isn't on Facebook and I don't have her email address so I went old school with a card.  Just the way I used to, back in the day.

Going It Alone

Day 343

My intention today was to engage my family in a good old fashioned pick up trash session on our street. But since it was the first sunny, warm day with no snow on the ground since December, I suspected the kinder thing to do was NOT coerce/force/beg them to participate in this activity with me. Instead, I went it alone, the single trash picker.

Perhaps when this enjoying the beautiful weather thing gets old, I'll get the family to join me.

Thinking of Japan

Day 342

We made a donation today to the Red Cross for the recovery effort in Japan. It is impossible to watch the coverage of the devastation and not want to do something to try to help.

This morning as I was watching and reading the news it seemed beyond horrific. But it also seemed so far away and unreal that it didn't touch me in a way I would have expected. Later in the day I saw some film footage of a cars being swept away, and I noticed one was the exact same as our family's car. In that moment the distance seemed to close and the unreal quality to what I was feeling disappeared. That was some one's car, very possibly it belonged to a family just like mine.

It was a reminder that the world is indeed a small place, and that what we all have in common is so much greater than our differences.

Lost And Found

Day 341

I was at a meeting at my son's school this morning. I stopped by the restroom and spotted a text book on the floor, along with some notes so I brought them to the office.

Now, I realize this does not seem like a very impressive act of kindness. Of course I should have turned the book in to make sure it was returned to the rightful owner. But this project has made me so much more aware of the small things one can do to make some else's day just a little bit easier, or more pleasant or even just more tolerable. I would like to think that I always do the right thing, with or without blogging about it. But I am not 100 percent certain I would have even noticed the book a year ago. Or I may have just assumed whoever lost it would know right where to find it. I can't really know for sure what I would have done in the past.

I do know this. I have a new found radar for acts of kindness and acts of "do the right thing" that I hope will stay with me in the future.

Partners in Kindness

Day 340

Picking up some prescriptions today I noticed there were gift cards for the sale to the right of the register. I bought one for five dollars and asked the person at the register to give it to then next person who looked like they could use a nice surprise in their day. I have done this a number times in the course of this project. The first few times I tried to get out as fast as I could with little explanation about what I was doing. It was a combination of feeling uncomfortable and wanting it to be a truly random act of kindness.

I have "evolved" in my delivery, and when the cashier looked a bit perplexed about my request, I took some time to explain that I was just trying to do something nice for a stranger because it was fun to do. Her appearance changed from confused to interested to happy, and I could tell she was pleased to participate in the plan.

Having partners in kindness really does seem to be more fun.

Put The Phone Down

We went out for pizza tonight with my brother who was visiting from out of town. In the restaurant were a couple candy machines, the kind you put the money in and get a handful of M and M's or jelly beans. While we were waiting for our dinner, I walked over (surreptitiously so my kids wouldn't see me) and placed a couple of quarters on top of the machines.

I was really hoping to see someone find them. At one point a group of three girls came in with an adult. They looked around 9 or 10 and were dressed in soccer gear and seemed to be getting dinner after practice. They were hanging around the candy machines as the adult placed an order. I was sure that one of them would find the money but alas, it wasn't meant to be. They were all too busy checking their cell phones to even look up.

Cell phones are one of my pet peeves. Kids with cell phones are an even bigger pet peeve. And even bigger than that is kids who are clearly to young to have cell phones but have convinced their parents they are necessary in case of an emergency. Pair that with the cell phone use that prevents someone from finding my random act of kindness and you have one pretty cranky kind person.

We left before anyone spotted the coins. I'm sure they were found eventually and perhaps brought a smile to someone's face. And hopefully, that person was not talking on their phone at the time.

Peanut Butter Saves The Day

Day 338

As the end of the day neared, there was no glaring, blogworthy or even slightly interesting act of kindness to report. I went to my go to act in the clutch, a jar of peanut butter in the donation bin at the local grocery store. Given that it was the ONLY item in the bin, it appears that it wouldn't hurt to make this a more regular act in the repertoire.

Spring Temperatures Bring Hope And Trash

Day 337

As the snow melts, many things are revealed in my yard. That lost sled. The snow shovel that went missing. My black gloves that my son swears he didn't wear. And sadly in my neighborhood the melting snow uncovers trash, and lots of it.

When I went out for a run to enjoy the spring like temperatures, I picked up a few pieces along the way. A little more melting and I sense a Saturday family project in the making...

Kind of Scammed

Day 336

My family went to an event in the city today, and when we were parking the car a man walking by told us that we were in a no parking zone, and that there were some open spaces a block over. We thanked him and as we were getting back in the car, he said that he needed to take a bus home, and was just 85 cents short for the ticket. What seemed like a kind act quickly appeared instead to be a bit of a scam. My husband and I looked at each other and realized we had no choice but to give him a dollar.

We didn't feel like we had a choice because we were with our boys, who were already impressed that this man had been so helpful to us. To have to explain to them why we wouldn't be kind to him, and that perhaps he wasn't a nice as he seemed was more than we wanted to take on in that particular moment.

Besides, there is a chance that it was true, that he was a nice guy who was a dollar short for the bus. But if that's truly the case, I think I will look into that swamp land in Florida that seemed like such a good deal....

Take This Coffee. Please.

Day 335

Most of the time I try to commit my acts of kindness quietly without drawing too much attention to myself or the act. But today I needed to name it for what it was.

There was a conference at work and I was sitting at the registration table with a colleague. I had brought her a cup of coffee but she had already gotten one for herself, so there sat the extra large cup of dark roast looking for a home. A woman came to the table to register and asked if there was coffee available. I offered her the homeless cup and explained that it was an extra. “Oh no” she said, “I couldn't do that.” “Really” I replied, “please take it.” She looked a little flustered and offered to pay me for it. I said no, she insisted, and quite frankly I was starting to worry that we were going to have a knock down drag out fight about this. Until I said the magic words.

“Just consider it an act of kindness.”

Her face brightened and said thank you and accepted it with as much enthusiasm as if she had won the grand prize in a lottery. She thanked me at least three more times throughout the day.

I'm not sure why it was difficult for her to receive the coffee as an act of kindness until it was expressly named as such. But I was happy rational heads prevailed, it didn't come to blows and she enjoyed the coffee and the kindness.

Following Commands

Day 334

"Do a kind deed!"

That was the title of an email I received today. It was from the parent of one of my son's friends who is doing raising money by doing a walk for breast cancer research. And since, at that point in the day no blogworthy kind deed had surfaced, I took as one of those "meant to be" things and pressed the donate button straight away.

I am wondering what will happen when my year commitment to this blog is complete. Will I continue to view requests for kind deeds as a commands? Will I fall off the pace without my self imposed blogging requirement? My plan is to continue living kindly of course. But there is something about a public commitment that keeps one honest.

Time will tell, I suppose...

Think Spring

Day 333

I know it was Give Flowers to a Stranger Day just a few days ago, but I celebrated again today. Recently the small grocery store near my house opened a florist section. And often I can find flowers there for a dollar a stem. Perfect for those days when I'm short on kindness for a stranger ideas.

Today there were beautiful irises. I bought three and went into parking lot with the wind blowing and the temperature dropping, and left them on car in the parking lot with a note “Think spring!”

Welcome Back

Day 332

Last October I wrote about a local fish market where there had been a fire. It is a business run by two brothers that has been in the community for over 30 years. These are truly two of the nicest guys you will ever meet.

Today, the store reopened for business. I stopped on my way home from work and encountered two of the happiest fish mongers you have ever seen. It was almost a festive atmosphere as customers trickled in and the story of the last five months was repeated, filled with details of construction, permits, inspections, waiting, more waiting and then the final triumph of receiving the occupancy permit.

The owners were clearly grateful for the customer support and I was grateful to be able to offer it to such a fabulous locally owned family business.