An Eye to Kindness

Day 184

An easy act of kindness to fulfill today. It was open house this evening for the 6th grade at my sons' school. The letter that came home about it requested that parents bring an item for the local food pantry. I thought this was a great idea. There are about 250 children in his grade, so I was expecting to see stacks of food by the door when I went in. Sadly, it seemed that there was a very small amount collected. Apparently not everyone views such a request as the mandate as I do, or perhaps it's just that everyone was so focused on meeting their child's teacher they did not notice the request for donations. This blog has caused me to realize that there are often opportunities for kindness around us, if we only open our eyes to see them.

You Can Tell Them I Sent You

Day 183

I met for lunch with an old friend today. She lives about an hour and a half from me, so we had to find a place in between. Fortunately we're living in the age of instant information, a fact that often annoys me, but today worked in my favor. A few clicks of the mouse and I found a great restaurant almost exactly midway between our homes.

It was wonderful catching up and the place we met was great too. The staff was friendly and the owner made his way around to all the tables asking how things were, as if it were an upscale restaurant, not a pizza joint pretty much in the middle of nowhere. Thus was born my idea for today's act of kindness; I would write a review on line.

When I got home I hopped on the computer, and wrote a few sentences, all positive. When I posted, it showed my whole name, first and last. I didn't like that; I'm not really sure why, since I said all good things. So I went back and deleted it. That took me about 15 minutes to figure out how to do. Then I wrote another one. Same problem. deleted that one too. Tried a third time. My act of kindness which I had planned on taking up about 5 minutes to do was moving past 45 minutes toward a full hour. The piles of laundry waiting to be folded were calling louder every minute. At that point I decided to say proudly using my full name “New York Style Pizza is a great place! If you are ever in the middle of no where in Connecticut, do stop by!”

Today I sacrificed anonymity for kindness. Or maybe maybe just so my family could have clean socks to wear.

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Today I am halfway though this project. 182 days left, if anyone is counting....

Kind of Fishy

Day 182

There is a small fish market I have been shopping at for years. When my kids were little were tagging along with me, they men who run the place always joked with them and made sure to include lollipops with my order. Now I usually go in without my boys but the guys still throw a couple pops in the bag. And each time I visit, there are smiles, laughter and joking. It is hard to imagine such happiness selling fish, but it is true.

I stopped there tonight on my way home from work. I was feeling a bit gloomy but felt myself starting to smile as soon as I pulled into the parking lot. I got my fish (salmon- my younger son and I love it, my husband and older son won't touch the stuff) along with the pops. For the first time in all my years shopping there, I told the guys running the place how much I value their joy and positive attitude. They laughed in the same manner they always do, and said that's how they keep the fun in their day.

Today's act of kindess was yet another example of showing appreciation for kindness I have received.

GFTAS Day

Day 181

It's the 27th of the month, and you know what that means! Give Flowers to a Stranger Day.


I felt fortunate that GFTAS Day this month was on a Monday. That meant that I could use Sunday to prepare. Yesterday I cut some beautiful fall flowers from my yard and arranged them in a vase that I found tucked away in the basement. I am much better at giving flowers away than making a presentable arrangement, so this took me a considerable amount of time.

Today I knew my destination. There is a nursing home near my work where my aunt lived a number of years ago. My plan was to go and deliver them to a resident in need of some cheer. But when I arrived my emotions snuck up on me. I didn't expect to feel such sadness about missing my aunt. It has been almost 10 years since she passed away, but she was one of those special people who lives on in your heart.

I left the flowers receptionist at the front desk, with instructions to please give them to a resident who didn't often receive such gifts. She seemed surprised; it was clear this was not a common occurance. Perhaps as GFTAS Day catches on, there might be more folks walking with this same request in on the 27th of every month.

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The history of Give Flowers to a Stranger Day can be found in these previous entries.

Montly Feature
Flowers For a Stranger
Flowers Anonymous
Controversial Kindness
It's Sweeping the Nation!

The day has also been celebrated on Smiling,Laughing and Loving Life and Love Your Neighbor. They too, have discovered that the joy seems to be shared equally in the giving and the receiving. Give it a try next month and you'll see.

Time to Quit?

Day 180

A few weeks ago I wrote about rolling change with my younger son (To Heck With College) to donate to our local animal shelter. Today, seemingly out of the blue, my older son asked if we could roll some of the spare change on my husband's bureau to donate to help Haiti. The conversation went something like this:

Him: “Mom can we put some of dad's change into rolls to help Haiti?”
Me: “Why, is there something that you want?”
Him “No, I just thought it would be nice.”
Me: “Are you sure? Is there something you're going to ask me for when we're done?”
Him: “No, I feel bad about the earthquake and I want to help.”

Well, knock me over with a feather. Kindness seeping out of my family without me suggesting, cajoling or nagging.

So the three of us, my two sons and I, took over the living room floor counting change, making piles and putting it all into paper rolls. My husband's contribution, not to be undervalued, was that he made dinner AND cleaned up after while the boys and I sorted and stacked.

It has been almost six months since I started this project, with six months to go. Today, I am tempted to say, “I'll quit now, I have achieved my goal.” But I made a commitment and I'm sticking with it.

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Tomorrow is the 27th of the month, Give Flowers to a Stranger Day. I can't wait!

Hand Me Down Some Kindness

Day 179

Our next door neighbors have two boys a few years younger than ours. That makes them the perfect recipients of my guys' outgrown clothes. I sent my younger son over to with a large bag today. This act of kindness benefits both family's since the filling of their closets frees up some space in ours. I'll throw in the environment as a beneficiary as well. Hand me down kindness, it has a ripple effect.

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Monday is the 27th of the month, and you know what that means. Give Flowers to a Stranger Day!

Look Out You Might Catch It!

Day 178

My husband and I were supposed to go on a “date” tonight but getting a babysitter to stay in a house where the stomach bug reigns seemed wrong. So my friend and I are going instead and I won't be home until after midnight. Probably the first time I will be up that late in a year or so. My rule is to be kind, but do it before 9pm. This is a long explanation about why I am exceeding my kindness budget this week. I have a self-imposed deadline of committing an act of kindness and posting it by five o'clock.

So with the pressure to act kind quickly, with nothing more creative in sight, I bought a $5.00 gift card when I was getting a coffee, and asked that it be given to the next customer after I left. When I did, I heard a very fun bit of information from the cashier. He said that while he had not experienced this particular act of kindness before, that it is not uncommon for someone using the drive through to buy a coffee for the person in the car behind them. And that when this happens the recipient often then does it for the next person. He said that it has gone on for as many as 10 customers in a row. I found this fascinating and heartening. It seems to be proof that, not unlike the bug that is making it's way through my household, kindness is contagious.

Super Nurse to the Rescue

Day 177

I got a call from the school nurse to pick up my younger son this morning. The dreaded stomach bug had taken him down for the day. Later in the afternoon when he was able to talk without moaning in pain (I'm not wishing this bug on anyone, it's a tough one) he mentioned how nice the nurse was as school. And she really is wonderful. She has been there for both my boys on a number of occasions. We decided to write her a note telling her how much we appreciate what she does, and my son is going to draw a picture. Superheros being his specialty, he is planning on a supernurse, cape and all.

The card is all set and ready to go. We are hoping for a healthier tomorrow to add the picture.

Keeping Abreast of Kindness

Day 176

I had a routine mammogram today. There is a temptation to include details to describe what an uncomfortable experience having one is, but I feel like I may have already provided too much information about my day with the opening sentence. Besides that, if you have had one you already know. And if you haven't and it is recommended by your doctor, you absolutely should get one. I don't want to scare anyone off from doing something that is so important.

Why bring it up here? Because the technician who took the x-rays had all the qualities one needs to perform such a job. She was calm, kind and sensitive. Most importantly she worked efficiently and quickly to get the procedure done.

When she was leaving the room, I made sure to thank her and say how much I appreciated her demeanor and her skills. And that her efforts to make the experience as comfortable and dignified as possible will help ensure that women come back each time that they need too. I actually did not FEEL all that dignified saying it with a johnny on, but I have to believe there is some dignity in being kind.

Cows for Kindness

Day 175

I feel like I'm cheating just a little, by counting today's act of kindness as my effort to “buy local.”

I stopped by a dairy farm on my way home from work and got our milk and eggs for the week. The store is right next to the cow barn. It doesn't get any fresher than that. Besides selling milk, the farm has the most amazing bakery on the entire east coast, in my opinion. Just before entering, all you can smell is, well, stinky cow farm. And then once you step through the door the luscious bakery smell takes over and it becomes almost impossible to leave without a treat to go with the fresh milk. A sign on the wall says “No fossil fuels were used in transporting this milk.” This prompted me to think I might be able to consider this my act of kindness for the day, since supporting a local farm is good for the economy and good for the environment.

Why do I feel like I'm cheating? Because we almost always buy our milk there. The truth is, once you drink milk fresh from the farm, there's no going back. It's not always convenient but we do make the effort go there every week.

As I was lugging my four gallons (we drink a lot of milk in our house) out to the car, a man offered to help carry them for me. Wow! Just as I was pondering the legitimacy of my daily act of kindness, a stranger offered one to ME! I took it as sign. It is kind to buy local and it's also a sure way to meet people who are kind.

Get On The Kindness Bus

Day 174

Since starting this blog almost 6 months ago, I have written more cards and emails than I have in the past several years combined. This project has helped remind me of the importance of letting folks know that they are appreciated. I've written to my sons' pediatrician and the nurses at the practice thanking them for going above and beyond for us. The boy's teachers have received notes, as well as the soccer coach and other assorted very important people in their lives. I've tried hard to remember special occasions like birthdays and graduations as well as acknowledging difficult life events as well. This may be the year of the blog for me, but it is also the year of the card.

Yesterday I saw a school bus driver negotiate a busy intersection with a bus loaded with kids, I thought of someone I wish I could go back and thank, my elementary school bus driver. I remember him as a cranky old man who yelled at us constantly for misbehaving. Looking back, it must have been incredibly difficult for him to drive safely with a bunch of ill mannered children ignoring his efforts to control them. It was about 40 years ago, and I still feel guilty about my behavior.

So I did something today to try to make amends. I wrote a thank you note and addressed it “Dear Bus Driver.” It said how much I appreciate the work that school bus drivers do and that I know it is a difficult and important job. I said that I hoped that the kids on the bus behave better than I did as a child. And I included a gift card for local coffee shop.

I slipped it onto the windshield of a bus in the parking lot of the shopping plaza near my office. I can't go back and change the past, but I hope it brightened someone's day in the present.

Run and Recycle

Day 173

I ran with my family in a large 5k road race event today, with over 6000 runners participating (and no, I didn't win). With such a large crowd came lots of water bottles, pizza boxes and other waste. There was a group of volunteers from an an environmental organization doing a phenomenal job sorting the recyclables from the trash. It seemed as if they had person posted at every receptacle and recycle bin. These folks were also explaining to people as they deposited their items in the proper place what was recyclable and what was not, that caps on water bottles are now acceptable to recycle in our state.
It was like there was a mini seminar available for anyone who wanted information. I noticed from their tshirts that it was the same environmental group I had written about on Earth Day.

Having gained even more appreciation about this group then when I learned about them in April, I sent off an email when I got home thanking them for their outstanding efforts in the state. And I took made an even greater effort when sorting the trash this evening.

Whew! No Need for Kindness Here

Day 172

My sons have decided to give karate a try (officially, as opposed to in our basement with me screaming from the top of the stairs “Will you guys be careful, someone is going to get hurt!”). I was watching their class today when another participant, a little boy who looked to be around 6 or 7, was unexpectedly sick. The instructors sprang into action, one strategically moving the class to the other side of the room while another went into cleaning mode. As the boy was directed into the bathroom I looked around for his mom or dad. It appeared that he was on his own.

I jumped up to assist him and asked where his parents were. He seemed to think his mom was outside the building but when I went to look she wasn't there. One of the instructors then told me that she was dropping the boy's sister off at dance class. So I went back to help him get cleaned up, settled down and organized.

The absolute truth is however, he didn't need much help. This was one self-assured and self-sufficient little boy. I was relieved because I'm not actually very good at assisting my own kids in this type of situation, so the thought of helping someone else's was not easy for me. My sons can count on me to rub their backs and to say soothing things but when it starts to get grim, they know enough to moan “It's time to get Dad.” I was happy to remind the boy that he needed to get his shoes on as he waited by the door for his mom to come. That was well within my skill set.

Today I was grateful to be on call for an act of kindness not needed.

Date Night

Day 171

The end of the day came around and there was no blogworthy act of kindness in sight. Alas I turned to the old standby, picking up trash. Unfortunately, it seems there is always an abundance of it by the side of road. This time of year it is trickier as the poison ivy is there too. Armed with bags and gloves, and giving our sons a pass because of the afore mentioned poison ivy, my husband shared an early evening trash picking date. Who says romance is dead?

A Cheese Doodle Smile

Day 170

I was at the grocery store today when a woman asked me to help her get some cheese doodles off the next to the top shelf. They were .99 cents, which she considered an excellent deal, so she was stocking up for her grandchildren. Now, I don't consider helping her to be an act of kindness, since she asked for my help and not only would it have been unkind to say no, it would also be considered rude and rather heartless. But my commitment to kindness did help remind me to slow down a bit, and take the time to stop and chat. She and I agreed that all kids love cheese doodles and I confessed that I do too. We also discussed orange dust. Her solution is to allow her grandchildren as many as they want, as long as they stayed seated in one place while eating them. Having exhausted the conversation opportunities involving cheese doodles, we said goodbye and each went our own shopping ways.
the orange dilemma; how to allow cheese doodle eating without the house being covered in
I felt good about today's act of kindness for a couple of reasons. One, I managed to work cheese doodles into a blog entry for the second time in one year (A Cheesy Act of Kindness, August 16). Who would have thought that was possible? But more importantly, I truly enjoyed talking with a stranger and find a commonality as mundane as, yes, cheese doodles. When I walked away I was smiling. I'm happy I could assist the woman in making sure her cupboards were stocked for grandchildren, but I think the true beneficiary of today's act of kindness was me.

Almost Missed the Deadline...

Day 169

I thought today would be the one I feared, the one that I wouldn't be able to post. I was sick with a stomach thing for most of the day, not able to venture out of the house or out of the bed for that matter. Around 7 tonight though I arose, better, stronger, but without an act of kindness.

What to do? Search the internet for an idea was all I could think of. But not before checking Facebook where I noticed it was my cousin's birthday. This is this is the same cousin who encouraged me to leave a pocket of sunshine (Not Too Foo Foo For Me, August 3) for someone to find. Looking at her information I saw that she had raised money for a charity by running a marathon. It was last year but her donation page was still up.

A contribution has been made in your honor J. I hope you had a fabulous birthday and thank you for running for a great cause.

Not Original, But Kind

Day 168

One of the great challenges of doing this project is trying to think of something interesting to do every day. And when a day comes along when that doesn't happen, I have to remind myself that that point is not to be interesting, it is to be kind. If you have been have been following this blog since it's inception you might know that, when I begin an entry this way, it means that that I have kept my commitment to kindness for the day by putting a jar of peanut butter in the food pantry collection bin at the grocery store. I did it on July 6th, and before that on April 13th and on April 11th too. It's my go to act of kindness in the absence of any original ideas.

So let the record show that, on Septermber 14th at 5:15 it occurred to me that I had done nothing kind and and a peanut butter donation was made to the food pantry.

Putting a Name to Kindness

Day 167

Almost every day on my way to work I stop at the same place for coffee. Often when the woman at the register sees me walk in the door she will have my order ready (large bold). It makes me feel a little bit like Norm on “Cheers.” We usually chat about the weather or something along those lines. I recently saw her in the shopping plaza near my house and realized that, even though I see her almost every day, I didn't even know her name.

So today I asked. And tomorrow when I get my coffee I will be sure to say “Thank you Chris.”

Boomerang Kindness

Day 166

I was on my way to an adoption celebration today when I saw the chance to commit an act of kindness not even a half a mile from my house. A woman had stopped her car on the street and was asking a man walking his dog for directions. I could tell by the way he was shaking his head that he didn't know the answer to her question. I pulled my car over, hopped out and asked if I could be helpful. In fact I knew exactly where she was going and sent her on her way. Had I not been doing this project, I'm not sure I would have stopped. I'd like to think I would have, but it is entirely possible that I would have just assumed she was being assisted and driven right past.

I continued on my way and then spent some time helping to celebrate the adoption of quite possibly the world's most beautiful little girl. As I was leaving the party I was presented with a plate of to die for cupcakes (and for the record I am not a big cupcake fan) with a message to tell my boys it was the kindness boomerang hitting them for the cookies and other treats they have shared as of late.

I was kind enough to deliver them, minus the red velvet ones with cream cheese frosting. Apparently the boomerang glanced me on the way by.

Shopping, Eating, Advocating

Day 165

School shopping with the kids tonight is one activity that we all agree that we dislike. The kids hate trying on clothes. I hate trying to figure out what kind of pants will ever stay on my younger son when his legs seem to be growing exponentially, but his waist remains skinny as ever. My husband hates being a witness to how much it actually costs to keep our kids clothed.

To end the evening, and to celebrate finding 3 pair of pants that didn't immediately fall to the floor when my son put them on, we went out to dinner at a Vietnamese restaurant in the town where we were shopping. It is a family owned place that has been open about two years. It was not very busy at all for a Saturday night, much quieter than last time we had been there. The owner told us that the town council recently had eliminated the BYOB option from all restaurants in town, and that business had declined ever since. I'm sure the economy is playing a part as well, but it was sad to see how someone's chance of achieving the “American dream” dwindling. The owner had been, unsuccessfully, trying to reach some agreement with the town council and had posted a message asking customers to try to effect some kind of change as well.

I don't know much about the politics involved, and whether or not we could bring alcohol to the place didn't effect us in the least. But when I got home I emailed all the members of the town council to say that this family owned restaurant was a treasure and urged them to consider ways to work with locally owned business to help them survive this recession.

I'm not optimistic that any change will come before the place is out of business for good, but I do feel like it was important to try.

To Heck With College

Day 164

We decided to go all out on this kindness thing and turn our college fund over to charity. Sort of...

When we moved into our house 11 years ago and our oldest son was just 9 months old, my husband put a coffee can by the washing machine for change that went through the laundry. He put on a label that said “College Fund.” We recently decided that, since it wasn't exactly adding up to a huge amount and that by the time they went to college, it wouldn't put a dent in the bill, perhaps we could find a better use for our collection.

I asked my younger son to help me roll the change and pick where he would like to donate the money. Full disclosure here; his first response was that thought we should give it to him and his brother for arcade games. I said....no. I then told him about a recent article in the paper indicating that our local animal shelter was desperate for funds since town budget cuts left them with no money for veterinary care. He did an immediate about face and said absolutely that's where the money should go. He is incredibly soft-hearted when it comes to animals, thus playing right into my hands...

In case you are wondering just how much money went through our wash in 11 years, that would be 35 dollars and some odd change. Maybe by the time the boys do go to college, we could wash enough money to buy one book between the two of them. Maybe. I think spending the money on something my son really cared about is much more worthwhile. Besides, what would our sons do with half a book anyway?

L'Shanah Tovah!

Day 163


Today is Rosh Hashanah, the beginning of the Jewish new year. As I have mentioned in a previous post, I was raised in a non practicing Jewish household and my husband was raised in a non-practicing Christian household, and we are currently raising our sons in a non-practicing household. Through the years when the boys have asked “what religion is our family?” we have responded with some form of “Our religion is that it is important to be a good person and be good to others. This is the essence of most religions.” This is part of the reason for this blog project; we want kindness to be something we do, not just something we say we do.

One of the traditions of Rosh Hashanna is to enjoy apples and honey, which symbolizes the harvest of the old year and wishes for the sweetness of the new year. So our non-practicing household celebrated in our own way, by making candied apples, the kind with the red coating that sticks in your teeth (and incidentally, all over the stove) and the boys brought some to our neighbors, with wishes for a happy new year.

L'Shanah Tovah!

Acknowledging Grief

Day 162

I was at the office supply store today, picking up the last couple things on the back to school list that I missed the first time around. I bumped into (literally) a woman in the marker and pen aisle who, it turns out, was doing the exact same thing. We commiserated a bit about the joys and the challenges of the beginning of the school year. She added that this was a particular difficult year for her because her husband died six months ago and it was the first time she was doing the back to school routine on her own.

Initially I felt embarrassed that I had been complaining about mundane stressors of everyday life as she was dealing with such profound grief. I told her how sorry I was for her loss, and that I could not imagine how hard it was for her. She smiled just slightly and thanked me, her eyes filling up briefly. She then asked a question about what school system my kids were in, and we were off on the topic of the differences from school to school. We chatted for a few minutes and then went our own shopping ways.

Acknowledging death is often difficult. There is a misguided notion that talking about it will somehow re-open an emotional wound. It is a hard to know what is the “right” thing to say, but “I'm sorry for your loss” is almost never wrong.

Joyful Breakfast

Day 160

When I was buying my coffee this morning, I noticed a mom sitting at a table with her daughter who looked to be around two or so. They were chatting away, the mom remarking how incredibly delicious the apple fritter the little girl was eating looked, the girl replying something like “Holy moly it's good!” There was a running commentary about the sights and sounds around them. “Oh that's the coffee grinder. And there's the new fall display going up.” It was remarkable how the simple act of eating breakfast together seemed to be an exciting adventure filled event. It looked like they were having so much fun I was tempted to forget about work and join them. But instead I said to the mom that I could not help overhearing their conversation, and that it was so inspiring to hear that they were making a simple breakfast such a joyful event. She smiled and clearly was pleased.

Coffee and breakfast in my office at my desk was a much more mundane excursion.

Letting Go for Kindness

Day 159

I spent part of the day sorting through books to donate someplace...I'm not sure where yet. I did a big book donation a about a month and a half ago (The Power of the Deadline) but there are still many more on the shelves. Especially children books. Actually they aren't on the shelves, they are in large purple containers in the basement. They are there because my sons have a VERY hard time letting them go. Occasionally I sneak some out and put them in a donation bin. Inevitably, one or both of the guys will start looking whatever book is missing the day after I do this.

Today I put the power in their hands. Citing our commitment to kindness, I asked them each to pick out 10 books that they were done with so we could donate them where they are needed. They squawked a bit and but went into the basement and each came up fairly quickly with the requested 10 books. I was grateful they were cooperative AND that they didn't point out to me as they very well could have, that it was I who made the year long kindness commitment, and I didn't consult them on it either.

It is hard for my boys to let go their books, even if they know they had outgrown them by several years. I was proud of them today.

Run Fast Run Kind

Day 158

It was a beautiful day today. Perfect weather. Clear, warm and dry, a ten. I decided to go for a run to get some exercise. I'm not one of those people who loves to run. I've never felt a “runner's high,” and I doubt my endorphin level has ever been elevated while I was pounding the pavement. For the most part, I am miserable for almost every step I take. I do it to stay in shape, and believe it gives me the most “bang for the buck” in terms of calories burned.

So off I went, just wanting to get it over with, and not really caring about the bright blue sky. And for this reason, my being friendly to folks I saw along the way is today's act of kindness. “What an amazing day” I said to the woman working in her garden. “You've got that right!” she replied. “It couldn't be any more perfect today” to the man washing his car. “Without a doubt” he said. I saw about a half a dozen people along my route, and was friendly and upbeat with each of them. And they were all friendly and upbeat right back.

It would be fun to be be able to say that all this positive energy made my running a joy today. I must however, be honest and say that neither kindness nor running raised my endorphin level. But hopefully my efforts to show an positive spirit made a difference to someone I met along the way.

Kindness Blowing in the Wind

Day 157

Often the things I write about don't seem like acts of kindness, more like just doing the right thing. Today is one of those days...

This morning I was at the local farmer's market picking up a few things when a gust of the parting Hurricane Earl blew through and sent a flurry of papers from one of the stands flying. The woman running the booth started scurrying around trying to retrieve what had fallen on the ground while simultaneously trying to prevent what hadn't blown off the table from flying away. I dropped my basket and jumped in to help, grabbing whatever weighted objects I could, including a cucumber, a tomato and a jar of jam from my basket to hold down the piles. After we had retrieved all the wayward papers and secured all the piles, I went and scavenged around for some rocks to swap out for my items I had left on the table.

While it seems obvious that of course one should jump in and assist, the fact is that no one but me did. I'm left to believe it was the power of the blog that was the reminder I needed to do the right thing.

Doubting Common Courtesy

Day 156

My cell phone went on the blink recently so today I brought it back to the store where I bought it. It was still under warranty, but I went in assuming I would have to argue in order to get it replaced. To the contrary, the sales clerk who helped me could not have been nicer. He tried a number of things to fix it, and then told me they he would have to order a new one, at no cost to me. He said it would take one business day to arrive, but since today is Friday and Monday is a holiday, it won't be in until Tuesday. This was fine with me; I'm not a big cell phone user anyway. When the sales clerk gave me this information, it seemed as if he were worried that I would argue with him. He apologized repeatedly even though I said several times, several ways, no problem. On my way out I thanked him for his help, and said how wonderful he was to work with, and I meant it. And he said how much he appreciated me saying so.

It occurred to me after I left that, just as much as I was expecting him not to be helpful, he was expecting me to be irate that I would have to wait a few days for the phone. In this situation, we were each surprised by kindness and the courtesy of a stranger.

All Creatures Great and Small

Day 155

When I started this project, I established some rules about what would be considered an act of kindness for a stranger. I decided that being kind to animals would be included, since my younger son considers that they at least on par with humans. Today I had to decide if insects are were include in the animal category.

I was driving to work when a giant spider started walking across my dashboard. By giant I mean about an inch and a half big. Perhaps that doesn’t seem very big to you, but if it were on your dashboard, you might feel different. It was difficult to keep my eyes on the road and the spider at the same time, but I didn’t want to take a chance that he might take a leap onto the steering wheel. I’m pretty sure spiders don’t leap, but rational thoughts weren’t exactly ruling my mind at that moment.

I didn’t want to kill it, as he had done nothing to deserve that fate and it definitely would not be considered kind. But just because I didn’t want to hurt it didn’t mean I wasn’t jumping out of my skin looking at him. And I was fearing that my split focus, spider/road, could result in someone besides the spider getting hurt.

I rolled down my window and, as if he could read my mind, he crawled out and jumped (or was sucked) to freedom. I hope the landing was soft and he went on to find a home and a family.

Under the circumstances, it was the kindest plan I could muster.

30 for 30

Day 154

My husband and I are supporting a very kind act today. My nephew will be turning 30 tomorrow, and in honor of that milestone, and looking to be healthy into his next decade, he pledged to lose 30 pounds by his birthday and asked that people sponsor him a dollar a pound, with the money going to Girl's Hope. This is a local organization in his area that works with girls who have academic and leadership potential, but lack educational opportunities.

In addition he has organized a benefit concert 30 for 30 to raise more money for the cause. We are sending off the check and a birthday card today, and wish we could be there for the big event. If you're in the Pittsburgh area this Friday night stop by the Hard Rock Cafe for a great show and tell Ben Alper he's looking good and happy birthday! You can also tell him his aunt is very proud of him.

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About a week ago I posted about a good ju ju event I partipated in. Here is the video. If you look carefully, you will see me, my husband and the boys chicken dancing like there is no tomorrow.